'Twas the Night Before Christmas at Sea

Virginia spent Christmas 1991 at sea in the Caribbean. A few days before the 25th, the following was anonymously posted on the Wardroom bulletin board.

'Twas the night before Christmas,
when all through the ship,
the Skipper was nestled, enjoying the trip.
The XO was searching, making his trek,
checking the status of his second deck.

Ops was a flailing, yelling like hell,
at all the OS's, advising "ceasetell."
When up from below, the Cheng did appear,
asking the question "Why are we here?"
The question was answered by the wardroom with force,
stating emphatically "We're here for your ORSE!"

CSO was there, somewhat confused,
screaming "I'll help, if my radars are used!"
EMO was laughing at Hal's little joke,
"Your impotent radars are forever broke!"
How can we track the waters and skies,
when all we have is our poor lookouts eyes?

Then all of the sudden, the EWO came in.
To brighten the mood, he said with a grin,
"Missiles on the rails, for drugs are the cause,
but let's not launch on Santa Claus."

Suppo was gleeful, he knew he'd survive,
for he was appointed Group Four One Five.
"Send parts to the Conolly, the Downes needs stores.
If I do well this float, I'll get stationed ashore."

Chaps was a prayin', the movies could wait,
if you're payin' attention, you'll here him at eight.

Let's not forget CICO, his jolly ol' self.
Dress him in red and he'd look like an elf.
With kindness and forethought, I just heard him pass,
"Alfa Wiskey to Southrock, Get yo head out yo ass!"

The nubs in the plants have learned not to falter,
with the guidance and counsel of McGrath, Shares, and Walter.
To assist in their learning, books page-by-page,
are two prior enlisted named Reno and Gage.

The ship will be safe, with the Hessions and the Hubbards.
Keep Squash off the Bridge and Tom from the cupboards.
Bill Johnson on boats with A gang on track,
his last PQS is "making his rack".

Mr Hartsel in Comm, and Jeff on the guns,
we'll shoot up antennas and talk to no one.
With Fish at the conn, Mr Green shooting stars,
we'll end up in Milwaukee, smashing parked cars.

The DeGraws in the fleet, and his able trainee,
handle unreps and vertreps, as safe as can be.
Kevin's got the handle and Mark is OK,
Call Kevin first looey, don't call Mark "O.J."

All I've not mentioned, you know who you are,
your commitment and actions exceed all by far.
From Missiles and Deck, to the Galley and Stores,
you perform with distinction, we can't ask for more.
Keep up the spirit, the work and the play,
have a good evening and a good Christmas day.


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